Sunday, May 30, 2010

Reflections on Quotes

Looking up the word Politics in the dictionary. It’s a combination of two words: poli, which means many, and tics, which means bloodsuckers, I state my case!

I believe in an open mind, but not so open that your brains fall out – A. H. Sulzberger

A pair of cows were talking in the field. One says, “Have you heard about the mad cow disease that’s going around?” “Yeah,” the other cow says. “Makes me glad I’m a penguin.”

So rare to be offered a meal on airlines these days that a man was offered a meal, “would you like dinner?” “What are my choices?” “Yes or No,” Flight attendant replied.

A man stole my identity and got so bored, he returned it to me!

On the door of the post office in rural Esperance, N.Y.; PULL. If that doesn’t work, PUSH. If that doesn’t work, we’re closed. Come again.

The key to success? Work hard, stay focused and marry a Kennedy. A. Schwarzenegger.

Seen on the door of a repair shop: WE CAN FIX ANYTHING. (please knock on the door-the bell doesn’t work.)

“How much do you charge?” a man asked the lawyer.
“I get $50 for three questions,” the lawyer answers.
“That’s awfully steep, isn’t it?”
“Yes it is’” replies the lawyer.
“Now what’s your final question?.

New York a city that never sleeps, that’s because there’s a Starbucks on every corner.

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